Oh, Minnesota...

El (vice) presidente de Laurenation

M.I.A. at Coachella...upon seeing her performance, it was decided she was the perfect fit.

Instead of formatting my blogs into list form

my writings of self-importance will be deduced into one-sometimes misspelled-grammatically-incorrect run on sentence.

If Ebola and Swine flu got into a fight, who would win?

Ebola, obviously.

I totally want this hoodie

This hoodie rocks it so hard, it's on herbivore.com and I would like to own it.

the future president of Laurenation

Oh Karen O, you would be so righteous for the head of state. When my nation comes together, I am sending you a note on fancy stationary (hmmm, would puppies be too lame?) and asking (begging) you nicely if you would be my chairman O.

this is an every day activity for me

It really happened! Coachella made my dreams come true!

I really stuck my tongue in Rollins' ear!!

Morrissey....

I love you.

Coachella, 'ella!

Aw man, I'm going to Coachella this weekend!! Really excited to se M.I.A., even tho she is replacing Amy Winehouse. Would've enjoyed seeing her, but whateves. totally pumped about the lineup. And just being there. I have been agonizing over what on earth i am going to wear, but i think I have mastered it. A quick once over the wardrobe is required. My palms are almost sweating over here. But most importantly, I am really excited to be hanging out with my awesome boyfriend for the whole three days. I am meeting his parents for the first time, and I am a tad nervous. Thinking it should be interesting. You'll be the first to hear about it. Overall, excited to spend all day and night at a hot festival enjoying good music with my boy.

San Antonio

Last week I took a few day excursion to the great city of San Antonio, TX. My flight landed at 10pm, then I spent the day with my friend at the air force base, then I took her to my hotel room for a facebook session. She was happy to unwind, then we drove down to Riverwalk for a bit. I was hoping to get a glimpse of the Alamo, since it had been over 10 years when I was last here. But no dice.

one more thing that might make you angry

I joined twitter.

Sorry.

just to let you know.

I didn't buy smokes. I was totally a good girl.

Overheard at the doctor's office.

"...Armenians don't use birth control. they don't. They put it in their plants. I have never met an Armenian that uses it. Sometimes they even put it in their shampoo. Makes your hair really shiny."

Secrets make you feel filthy.

finally released. feeling like my self again, need to get stuff done. rebuilding myself, although lacking self-confidence. explicit insecurity and broken out skin. not depressed because of thursday. just an overall feel. lots of self-loathing. need to knock this off. snuggled with maurice, kitty drool over my hand. rolling over on his back he purred his thanks. came back for my affection, employment rang. kicked him out and fed him my salmon-flavored apologies.

I think that sounds about right.

a gift for my boyfriend

So, I'm thinking...

the pie chart to end all pie charts

Where his stuff went to...

misc. magazines and vhs (North Hollywood)

---

Reply to:
Date: 2009-03-03, 8:08AM PST

Hello!

I have a box of Playboys from 2007, 2006, 2008 I think. A few books that I have are some far side collections, a thick book on tyrants, mythogical gods and some random crap. MY ex left the crap in my house so out it goes!! Also, some vhs movies as well. I will put it out in front of 12745 Vanowen St.

Thanks!

• Location: North Hollywood
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 1058342552

I made this promise before

I am going to stop using cusswords in my blogs.

Really.

I should learn to use bigger, beautiful words instead of my foul mouthed usual.

Seriously.

You can even call me out if I fu-screw this up.

thanks.

Maurice

My boyfriend took a picture of the neighbor cat, which turned out quite nicely.

What I love most.

Food, I will never leave you.

Chicken Satay*, Orange Chicken*, garlic pepper chicken*, miso soup, avocado rolls, ginger dressing, cake batter ice cream (well, I will not refuse any ice cream-even pot laced kinds), any kind of thai food. I just love you food. I really, really, adore you and if any jerk calls you out- you know i got your back.

Really wanted you to know that.

*vegan.

A Henne and Her Holga...part 1

I took my purple Holga up to Ventura, CA for a night of excitement and old people fishing.
There's only one way to hang in Ventura.

More to come...

Old Poloroid pics....

My sister cleansing the dinner ware
Michael hard at work being the "Master" Control Operator.
I have a Poloroid Land camera from the late '60s that I love to shoot with. I took these a few years ago. This one with my Mom and Gramma was taken shortly after my Aunt's funeral. The one below is mom's fave kitteh, Minnie. She looks like a fat ass there though.

A book about Micro nations...

What do you think?

I was passing the idea through my mind the other day and I couldn't help but think how fun of a project that would be. Maybe selecting a few places, some that are in the U.S. and some abroad. I couldn't believe that they are some here too.

So...are you up for a trip?

New awesome toy....

My boyfriend bought me this for Valentine's Day:

I admit; the device almost gets more used for it's wi-fi abilities...whoops!

Blog watch '09

I bought some satay mix the other day and I need to make some satay skewers. Or, I might have to go to my fave spot in Studio City and get some.

Laziness.

Orange chicken sounds good too.

I think I just need some protein.

I miss my friends

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

- Oprah Winfrey

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.

- From the movie Annie

A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for 'tis better to be alone than in bad company.

- George Washington

Misfortune shows those who are not really friends

-Aristotle

The werewithal to have self-realization.

I am a COMPLETE slacker.

After being fed-up with my utter laziness; my boy gave me an idea: construct a syllabus. Then, I can study certain areas more intensively and then, ONLY then, conquer the program.

Well,

hopefully.

I have just been angry with Laurenation; she doesn't study, she lies to herself, and always starts things she doesn't finish.

No more.

matter of fact

I went to comment moderation and i realized I have 6 total.

Loser.

wow, like, you totally inspire.

Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live."- Norman Cousins

I was naturally a loner, content just to live with a woman, eat with her, sleep with her, walk down the street with her. I didn't want conversation, or to go anywhere except the racetrack or the boxing matches. I didn't understand t.v. I felt foolish paying money to go into a movie theatre and sit with other people to share their emotions. Parties sickened me. I hated the game-playing, the dirty play, the flirting, the amateur drunks, the bores."
-charles bukowski

Never again will you be capable of ordinary human feeling. Everything will be dead inside you. Never again will you be capable of love, or friendship, or joy of living, or laughter, or curiosity, or courage, or integrity. You will be hollow. We shall squeeze you empty and then we shall fill you with ourselves."
-george orwell, 1984

I swear, by my life and my love of it, that I will never live for the sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine.
-Ayn Rand

Develop an interest in life as you see it; the people, things, literature, music - the world is so rich, simply throbbing with rich treasures, beautiful souls and interesting people. Forget yourself.

-Henry Miller

it's like this, and uh like this, uh...

I took my pro tools class. Basically two 8 hours days of lecture. I bitched on my survey. Also bought a 110 level (level 2) book and I am hoping to purchase the program with the ed discount. A lot of frustration all around. Don't feel like writing, yet I have so much to say.

Meh.

What is the deal son?

Is it just me, or does Tommy Lee Jones say "son" at least once in almost every one of his movies?

Hemorroids are like lil road blocks

Audio editing.

I think that's what I want to do. Being at my Avid class the other day, it sort of hit me. It's an area that I have always wanted to dabble in.


So, I'm thinking a Pro Tools class at Video Symphony in Feb.

I've been getting along for long before you came into the play

...the bullshit in my soul has ceased; he no longer wins a place in my gray matter. the swirl of forget-about-its and why-does-it-matters have settled in. journal readings and cruel messages matter nothing to me.

internally, i can honestly say i am at peace.

externally; I need a haircut.

How i am not myself!

Unraveling at a fast pace, thinking maybe I should gather my things and move on, but another portion of my grey matter unfurls in a dangerous direction which I cannot see or really smell, and that is what is the achilles of me is that I require a scent of defeat after I realize that I am an extradorinary machine, but really, all that I really, really, desire is a hug from a human that can recite my my last five adventures without flinching.
True loneliness only elipses sadness, because alot of people think that if you are lonely, well, then you must be sad; to be verdad, I am a lonely person, but not a sad one. I always feel that I am missing out on something, somewhere, or perhaps there is a being that I could be interacting with and not feel like I am perpetually annoying them.

…the lifeform that occupied a part of my life didn't really know me, and he never hid it well.

When you've been co-habitating for six years.

Life is about growth, which is wonderful, though not always easy. Indeed, many of lifes lessons can be painful or difficult. Yet, such challenges are often the ones that present the most opportunity for spiritual growth. Initiations for growth come in many forms. In fact, we can view every challenge in life as an opportunity to learn and grow. While these disruptions in life are not easy, they are necessary. The challenges the universe sends us can seem unbearable at times: a job we dont want to spend another day at, a broken heart that feels as if it will never heal, or a long and painful illness. And then, there are the challenges that can be just as scary because we are being called to step up to the plate in ways that we may think we are not yet ready for: overcoming our fears in order to realize a lifelong dream, leaving behind a situation or people in our life that we may have outgrown, or moving across the world for our dream job or life partner. At such times, it can feel as if the world is testing us and that life is asking more of us than we think we can give. We may feel uncomfortable, frightened, and unsure of what to do. However, life isnt so much going against us as it is encouraging us to grow. During these periods, we can grow stronger by putting one foot in front of the other, as we work through our challenges. We may be asked to let go of old safety measures, shift old patterns of behavior, or step into the abyss of the unknown. When we do rise to the occasion, we end up better off for having made that journey. Not only do we end up learning and growing, but we inevitably become more compassionate to the challenges of others and wiser in the ways of the world. Our faith in the universe also grows because, ultimately, we cant help but realize how much we are supported and taken care of at all times. When we are in the midst of a growing period, it is not easy to see our reward, but it is there, waiting for us to grow big enough to reach it....the dailyom.com

I love me some twins...

GEMINI - LEO : Noble generous Leo will be a toy in the hands of Gemini – and will be pleased with it! Gemini are clever and diverse in a sexual game, and Leo will be admired by the behavior of his partner. Leo will let Gemini go their own way. This partnership is ideal. Liaison will be splendid and admirable; a more durable relationship is quite probable

But, my bags aren't packed yet!

Sick of not sleeping in my own bed, dealing with bullshit that I just want to be done with. Seth has realized (finally) why I broke it off. He took me for granted for all these years, and I did all the work to keep us together. I felt like a mom. The drain from being with him was finally getting to me. When I went back home for a celebration, my friend Isaac drunkenly told me that it was good that i broke up with him because I sounded so unhappy when we were in south america. i knew he had a point; no matter if it was an intoxicated mess of one or not.

urban dictionary 1, laurenation, 0

2. Man Child

A man child is a male who is over the age of 25, who still lives as though he is a juvenile. Many man-children are not gainfully employed, and survive off of the financial support of their enabling parents. Heavy video-game addiction to fantasy games such as World of Warcraft are key to the man-child.

Isn't this familiar?

I finally broke up with Seth last month. It was a long time coming; but it was most definitely coming. I really didn't think I would actually do it, but living in misery wasn't working for me. He is moving back to MN, much to his dismay. I asked him why he doesn't just get a second job and a roommate, but he wants to do this on his own terms.

As for me, I am looking very, very proactively for my on place to start over in. I am looking all over L.A., hoping to stay under 800. But who knows, I need to get something before January. Albeit, I am a little too close to buying a pack of smokes.

Frickfrack.

My part time love

5 days a week, I walk this lovely being by the name of Nelson. There is only a 30 minute obligation-but the time flies a little too fast for me, and before I know it an hour has passed. Nelson enjoys a good belly rub, and a gnarly chew on my pants. I don't really appreciate the latter.



... don't even try it.

Apologizing for the lackluster

Yeah, I know what I said.

There will be pictures, with said blog, coming soon. With Jill passing, programs to learn, and booking trips to hometown for commitment ceremonies there hasn't been much time left for bonding with blogger.

I will say that previously mentioned events are clearing up-and I promise you that I will entertain. My eyes are leaning towards an excellent cupcake recipe that will be made in your honor.

Seriously,

Laurenation

Good bye to a beautiful spirit

Underwater Adventures will never be the same without you Jill. I hope you are surrounded by tree frogs and turtles and other lovely creatures where ever you are. It still feels too surreal; when I first heard the news of your passing, it felt like a practical joke. I can't go home to pay my respects, but please know this-you always made me feel like I was pretty damn awesome.

And I hope that feeling was mutual.

Admitting to infidelity never felt so disgraceful

Blogger, I have a horrible confession. And it involves you. And me. And Tumblr.

Yes, Tumblr.

Blogger, I'm sorry, but I just found someone a little more dazzling. It's sort of like the first time you crap your pants as an adult and it's such a disgusting moment, but you realize how zany it is and call most of your contacts in your phone book just to laugh about your neonate tendancies.


You know, right?


Please, no drama. You know maybe if you weren't so droll I wouldn't be inclined to seek out more exciting options. I don't know, maybe get a different interface every now and then? We can stay together if you can handle me eating someone else's tater tot casserole.

But didn't you have some clue? The empty promise of South America pictures, bunny museum adventures, or me baking cookies?

But don't worry Blogger, I will be back for bedtime-but don't expect me to tuck you in.

Must be nice...

...to be 9 years old and have that kind of set-up.

My lil' Stowaway

I forget that I live in Los Angeles sometimes; but every now and then I am reminded by an occasional lizard in my tire well. He's been laying about lately, especially now with the 100+ degree heat. After much prodding, I scared him off into a different spot of shade.

I might start putting out cricket cocktails for him.

Inspirational reading

Last christmas my mom gave me a bunch of books from estate sales that she collected over the last few months. She knows my weakness for the written word, and to give her much credit, the books were all awesomely varied. The one that dominated my attention was Notes to Myself - By Hugh Prather.


A passage that really got me was one about making mistakes. I am quite the perfectionist, which is nerve-wracking most of the time. He writes: " My fear of making a mistake seems to be based on the hidden assumption that I am potentially perfect...a "mistake" is a declaration of the way I am, a jolt to the way I intend..."

To read something that honest and insightful is, well, really quite refreshing. It seems we never take the time to think about the small things that we encounter daily. We just shrug it off and go about our day, even though it did have a lasting effect. I guess more so I am pleased to find another wisdom laden book that is accessible to all.

The only thing I didn't care much for was the Christian language that was inherent throughout the book. It slightly contradicts it's message; which I think may have been intended.

Space dogs of the Jurassic live by Trailer disasters

The small museum front was alluring- in a stranger offering me candy sort of way.

A baby with gangrene?

Yes please.

Some random 3-D pictures...



I bet you never knew that Trailer disasters were commonplace during the mid-20th century.







Another area explained performance spaces, but I was distracted by the lovely ship.



and what you’ve all been waiting for...





Space dogs!

These are actually paintings of the dogs sent into space. One of them had a lit candle and a small bouquet hanging on the frame. It was much too dark to snap it.





After a small, slightly disappointing space dogs exhibit, we were lured into the lovely and cozy tea room.





I think he might have been envious of the space dogs, so to fill the void he went around begging for cookies.



After a exceptional visit to the Jurassic Museum, the day was capped off at Venice Beach, a haven for fans of Space dogs and litter.

Keep your carrots under lock and key

The Bunny Museum!!

It really does exist, and I should be going there this weekend. I know there is much talk of pictures, which I might be embarking on soon from earlier events; but I am serious. There will be lots of photographic evidence from this land of leporidaes.


That much is certain.

Missing it...

Old People

Random

Rad Jose and his lady.

Meh.

Betty Crocker had no hand in this.

As of late, my inner Duncan Hines has been on the loose. A muchacho of mine had a birthday today and I thought, cupcakes would make this day perfect. But, I did have a prerequisite: they could not be bastardized by the dough boy. I spent most of the afternoon searching the interwebs for the magical formula. The one that won my heart was a simple chocolate cupcake with butter cream frosting. I read and re-read the recipe, then decided that I could make this fantasy become a reality.
I left my apartment armed with a list and a whole lotta hope. I stalked the aisles at Ralphs like a gerbil in a cheese factory looking for my components. When I came across the baking shelves, I admittedly lost steam. Grazing the box mixes, my mind unfurled into a realization: why go to all the trouble of mixing ingredients and hoping against all hope that it may or may not taste good when all I gotta do is get eggs, oil and some water? The temptation was overwhelming, especially since the loss of steam was becoming apparent. Biting my lip, I reach for the cocoa powder that will (hopefully) blow minds while imbibing my mystical baked goods.
When I arrived home; my laboratory started coming together. Benny Goodman on the turn table, and all the tools of the trade: 2 mixing bowls, spatula, cupcake tin with foil cups for said comestibles; blender and an apron to catch all the delicious mistakes.
I was surprised how good the result was: I almost purchased some store mades just so I could have a control to compare my specimen to. After several minutes of self-congratulatory goodness, and pure awe that I didn't completely screw it up, my hips busted out a lil' ditty to celebrate my latest conquest.

Inanimate objects have their needs too.

New trip idea...but not really.

A while back I posted a trip idea for the Trans-Siberian/Manchurian Express. The excursion was inspired by a night with Henry Rollins I had back in 2005 at his spoken word show. Mr. Rollins, being the articulate raconteur that he is, enticed me into possibly doing the same journey. His descriptions of surly babushkas, mystery meat, in climate weather and Genghis khan/nomad-type characters ignited the travel bug that had mysteriously dwindled over the past months. Shortly after, an intense inter web search was on, and I completely tuned out of my job. Not like anyone noticed; master control is sort of lenient like that.

After a not so long search, I came up with some mildly irritating discoveries with all points towards mother Russia:

1. You need to be officially invited in.

2. You have FOUR NIGHTS valid on your transit visa, which allows for one or two nights in Moscow, an overnight train and two or one night(s) in St. Petersburg respectively, but you must be across the border before midnight on the final day of your visa. Basically, you need to be the hell out of there or you can expect a mighty huge fine.

It adds that you're better off booking your trip with a tour company or the like based on the fact that if your ass doesn't speak the Ruskie you might end up in Chechnya. And the tour company will at least procure your visas and arrange everything for you. And to be honest, I'm not all that interested in war zones. Even though I know you pegged me as that kind of gal; I will have to disapoint on this one.

Things I miss about Minneapolis.

1. My family.
2. Autumn
3. My lovely and brilliant friends.
4. Spyhouse
5. Pizza Luce
6. Hard Times
7. South Minneapolis
8. brownstone buildings
9. foxfire...which I know hasn't been around in ages, but I was thinking about it the other day.
10. making movies with friends

There's always more to add, but at this moment I was missing those.

Bye!!

I'm taking off to the Southern hemisphere, hope everyone is well! I will most definitely post some pictures when I get back.


(And the um, space dogs one too)